Dead Sea Pearls into Retail Markets

Nora

Art historian and devout NCN
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Dead Sea Pearls into Retail Markets

(Sodom, Israel) In a surprising move expected to revolutionize the fine gems market, Pearls of the Dead Sea (PODS) has announced a massive campaign to bring the rare and elusive Dead Sea Pearl into retail markets via the Internet.

Large Golden Pond Slime Lavender Purples Freshwater Pearls. You might think I like golden purple pea
Dead Sea Pearl Reef

Unknown until very recently and still considered extremely rare, Dead Sea pearls are non-nacreous round bio-chemo-quasi-organic-crystalline gemstones. Their basic component is an uncommon crystalline form of calcium carbonate know as gomorrite (sometimes called sodomite) with traces of brome and magnesium. The gems are perfectly round with a flat, matt smooth surface.

A unique property of Dead Sea pearls, related to its thin gomorrite layers, is the ability to absorb all light refractions and reflections except for pure white light. J. Roeh, founder and president of Pearls of the Dead Sea, said at the announcement: ?We consider the matt surface of our pearls so important that we have coined a new term to describe it ?dis-orient.? All our Dead Sea Pearls are disoriented.?

Roeh declined comment on whether his company will market the black Dead Sea pearl, which absorbs all colors of light, so that it cannot be seen at all.

While Pearls of the Dead Sea have not made public any details of its farming procedures, N. Lerner, GIA Graduate and Israel?s leading pearl expert, believes that PODS may be growing them in the thought-to-be extinct zombie conch (Strombus vivere-mortuus).

Large Golden Pond Slime Lavender Purples Freshwater Pearls. These were for my site. I wasn't going t Golden purple fireballs from Kojima pearl I strung into a necklace. It goes with everything I wear!
White Dead Sea Pearls (Black Dead Sea Pearls can?t be photographed because they absorb all the light from the camera and don't give any back)

[BS News, reporting on the lowest point on Earth from the lowest point on the Internet]
 
Has this anything to do with today being the 1st of April?
 
Black Dead Sea Pearls! Nora, that was a good one.
 
Hi Nora, Read this first over on face book and almost PMP (peed my panties). Great fun :)
 
yep, I reckon those ping-pong balls would give 'Edison' a run for their money any day

plus the pearls from the 'dark-side' would be very cool - no one would know you were wearing them, but I guess you could feel them (maybe even 'fondle' them !!)

:cool:
 
Nora!

Thank you for the Best AF chuckle I have had in a long time. Great one for April fools!!


Cheers
Ash
 
Awwww, I forgot it was April 1st and was thinking "What unfortunate terms to have to overcome re marketing"! I was gonna send out a "yea! Nora" for being recognized as an expert!

But anyway, "yea! Nora!" for an excellent AF Send-up!
 
Perhaps you forgot to mention that the black dead sea pearls, if marketed, would continue to absorb all light and soon this version of the universe would be in the dark.
 
Oh, gawwwwd, re-reading, disoriented!!!!! Priceless!
 
To Amanda and Wendy, to Dave and Winterson, to Adeline, Rusty and Bronwyn, Ramona and Marianne, Ash and Blair, thanks for all the kind words.
To Lisa, the same and for thinking about how to help with marketing
Alex, right on about the stock photos of ping-pong balls.
Pattye, this was a joint project of two diseased minds, Eli did the copywriting.
Caitlin, grateful for the compliments and kudos for giving us a place to run wild.
Narcissa, that exactly is the reason why we decided to give it up :)

To wrap things up, attached is the picture of Pearls of the Dead Sea's owner
Chocolate diamond and pearl ring
Mrs. Lot (salt sculpture in Lot Hotel Spa)
 
Oh, Nora and Eli, Peerless Pearlitzer Pranksters, such giggles!
 
Lisa, we enjoyed the reactions as much as the writing.
Thank you again!
 
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