wedding anniversary gift

[zb32]

Hi everyone,

my parents are having their 30 years anniversary, which is also called pearl wedding, so I thought of getting my mother some pearls as a present, and wanted to ask for some advice and opinions.
I'm quite clueless when it comes to jewelry and even after doing a bunch of reading about pearls still getting lost in different options and have number of questions. Please bear with me.

1. Trying to decide what "package" I should get, that is, necklace, necklace and earings, pendant and earings, etc.

2. I noticed that people around here are partial to freshwater pearls, I'm starting to lean in that direction too, though who knows. Are they really so close to, say, south sea pearls in visual characteristics (not considering size) ?

3. Are all those pink, lavender, gold and so on freshwaters dyed or natural color?

4. Some sites have these special collections, like freshadama, presidential, elite etc. of freshwater pearls, but isn't AAA grade is almost as high as you can get? Should be very round and 95% blemish free. How better than that can you get? What is the advantage of freshadamas and the like over AAA grade that same stores sell?

5. I was thinking of white pearls, then black, then lavender, now I'm lost I imagine white would look good with more combinations of clothes? What's your opinion on that?

6. When I was thinking of earings, would something over 10mm look bulky on the ear? I couldn't find any pictures on your "show us your pearls" forum. If anyone has some, I would be very much obliged.

7. Which places are trustworthy to buy from? I've read some negative reviews about certain site from here, which prevented me from ordering early. Also, what's this "normal price 750, our price 150" business? It looks suspicious to me. It easy to imagine 10-20% discount, but when on average it's 5 times cheaper than claimed "retail" price it seems fishy.
Back where I come from they like to slap a label "90% off" on something while selling it at normal price. If anything, it amuses me rather then makes me believe that I'm getting a killer deal.

Of course, the price is also a consideration. I can't afford too much right now, although I would like to get something worthy of the occasion. I can probably make it around 400 or so, maybe stretch to 500, which makes freshwater much more affordable, unless I wanted to buy a lonely SS pearl in a pendant and not have money for even earings.

What would you guys advise me to do?

Thank you in advance for your patience in reading this long post and your answers, any input is greatly appreciated

Alex

[Nerida]

Hi Alex,
Welcome to the forum! Great set of questions, and great idea to treat your Mum to something so special. Here are my answers/opinions.

1. If your Mum doesn't already have a strand of pearls, go for stud earrings and a strand. If she does already have pearls, go for a pendant plus earrings if you can do it.
2. FW pearls have fabulous lustre, and whilst they're not SS's, many here would say they are superior. You certainly can afford a strand plus studs within your price range with FW.
3. All black/peacock shaded FW are dyed, the whites will be bleached down a bit to make them whiter, but the pinks, lavenders and goldy colours are natural colours for FW pearls. Usually pearls of a poorer quality are dyed to produce the black FW's.
4. The Freshadama etc. ranges are those pearls that would normally only be used for earrings -ie, true gem quality - hand selected by the vendors. These pearls are fabulous, but AAA are also pretty spectacular as a strand.
5. Again, if your Mum doesn't already have pearls, go for whites. If she does, then maybe lavenders or a multicolored strand would be nice.
6. I find earrings (particularly if completely round, rather than button shaped) over 10mm sometimes "droop" - the weight of the pearl pulling the earlobe forward. Depends a lot on the piercings in the ear, but as your Mum has been married for 30 years, maybe go for 9mm or so - still significant, but not so large as to fall over. Also, if your Mum is wearing the set together, I like smaller earrings. Large earrings look great with a pendant, or with a bracelet, but can sometimes be too much with a strand.

7. Lots of great sellers - all mentioned here in the forum. Just don't buy from a site where you can't return the item. You are buying them sight unseen, so you do need that backup. Also, give yourself some time ahead of the anniversary to ensure the gift is right. The sponsors here all have fantastic customer service! The higher prices on the website reflect retail prices in B&M stores - usually these sellers are buying through one or more wholesalers - the online guys tend to buy direct, which, accompanied by lower overheads, keeps the prices down.
8. Whoops! No question 8!!

What a lovely thing to do for your parents!! Hope it goes well, and remember, we LOVE photos, so please keep us posted with your purchase decisions! Good luck!

[Pearl Dreams]

zb32, have you seen this?:

http://www.pearlparadise.com/detail.aspx?ID=2233

That is the PearlParadise.com special for June but it hasn't been withdrawn yet...not sure how long it will last. Seems like a nice item for an anniversary if you ask me. Even if your Mom has a strand, it may not be a long strand, and it can be doubled for a different look. A strand like that can be more casual or more dressy.

[pattye]

Hi Alex,

Yes, these are all great choices. When you have somewhat settled on the item(s), you will want to call--not just order online. Tell them what color hair, eyes, complexion coloring, and the strand can be custom picked to best suit your Mom.

In the jewelry stores, as well as the department stores, pearls pass through many hands and are marked up many times to pay for advertising and the cost of having a store front. Pearls from the online sellers are a truly great value.
Let us know how your shopping turns out!

Pattye
so many pearls, so little time

[Pearl Dreams]

I realize I didn't answer your questions but Nerida did such a good job!

But I do want to say, I think one reason so many of us like freshwater pearls is because they are such a good deal. They are nacre all the way through, unlike Akoya, SS, Tahitian, Cortez and others. They come in a variety of natural colors (as well some dyed colors) and they are easier on the budget.

If your Mom does already have white pearls, I would suggest a multicolored strand, which is more casual and goes with practically everything. And if I were only able to afford 2 items, I would make them an 18" strand and earrings of about the same size (or slightly larger if a drop.)

[Valeria101]

Just a thought...

larger pear studs sit right with the help of proper backings (the larger, clear disk thingies - like these).

It's a bit of a privilege for ladies of a certain age to pull off larger pearls that youngsters like myself need a good excuse for

Congratulations for the wonderful anniversary!

[Nerida]

Hi Ana - I've never seen this product before - fantastic!

Sadly, it's ladies of a certain age that, whilst they can carry off the larger pearls, seem to have the most problem with them tilting and drooping (hey, we'll all get there eventually) - you've just solved the problem! Thanks!

[pearlescence]

Don't forget your father - pearl cuff links? Or a single pearl on a leather thong.

[Nerida]

Good thought, Wendy! Either option would be great!

[jerin]

Hi everyone,

Alex you´v got plenty of good advice but as I am a lady of a "certain age" I would like to tell you to get button shaped pearls for earrings for your mother. They look much better, right backsettings or not. I almost never use my round pearl earrings anymore, despite being Freshadama quality. Up to 8,5 mm round could be OK, larger - choose buttons. As for the likeness of freshwaters to South Sea - in this case it is about the size, as South Seas start off at 8 mm and then can be very huge depending on the nucleus inside the shell. Colourwise freshwater have of course a more satiny look than Akoyas but fine South Seas are even more "satiny" in their looks. And they are bead nucleated.
Take a look at "South Sea Pearls" thread The big strand by Airdancer from yeaterday and you can see the finest available of South Sea Pearls, I tried to copy the link but get the wrong "picture" all the time....
As for quality: very soon we are going to see Freshwater pearls with a nucleus inside (there already are some) and then they also will have joined the rank of all the other beadnucleated pearls with only some layers of nacre instead of nacre all through. Some member advised on the "City strand", a lovely choice in itself if your mother already has aquired some taste for pearls, otherwise this length is perhaps better suited for the "advanced wearer", I speak out of my own experience of course. Nowadays I have several Opera lengths and love them but at the start I was absolutely happy with a necklace of 18", size 8-8.5. For my agegroup I think 9-9,5 mm do look very great but again, in the beginning I did not believe that a little larger size would be so good looking. Give the seller a call and you will get personal advice - good luck and let us see and know on what you decide...

[zb32]

Nerida, thank you very much for your reply.

It looks like I can afford either 7-8mm strand of freshadama type, or a 8-9mm of AAA grade. I read here that usually more mature women wear bigger pearls. Also my Mom is 5'7". What might be a better looking option? I wish I could see them side by side. I guess I could order both and return one of them, though I'd prefer to avoid that.

I've been looking at a city strand too, from pp, it's a little expensive for me, but it's twice as long, so it could be folded in two. Or should I just get a 16-18 inch strand? I don't think my Mom has any pearl jewelry.

Also I was thinking about dangling earings instead of the studs, should I get same size as necklace pearls or maybe 1mm smaller so that they don't jump out?

Thanks,

Alex

[zb32]

Thanks everybody. While posting, my page wasn't refreshed, didn't realize some of my questions was answered already. I guess AAA versus special collection is my main question now, have to get 1mm smaller for freshadama or presidential type.

[Raisondetre]

Size does depend on build, but also on how comfortable a person is wearing big pearls. I'm quite small but used to think I couldn't pull off big pearls, and now I wear anything up to 10 mm, larger for baroques as they are quite casual. The gem pearls are top quality and would definitely show - it wouldn't be bad to get a gem set just for the wow factor even if it is a smaller size though. Size can take time to get used to, and she can always upsize it down the track. Gem would show attention to details and impeccable taste. As for the city strand, that's as good value as you'll ever get and it's very versatile - I doubt I could get such a good price for it even if I were to go to China myself. It would take hours combing through tons of junk to get a decent one. Extremely great value for money. I don't think you could go wrong with either. Gem set or city strand are equally good choices. Sorry I'm not much of a help. I want everything.

[Nerida]

For a lady "of a certain age" I would go size over quality. Whilst the Freshadamas get rave reviews, I think AAA is more than many women dream of...

[pearlescence]

I am probably about the same age as your mother. While build and colouring are important so is personality - is she the classic jewellery sort or a bit eccentric (we are allowed to start working on being dotty old ladies about now!)
If the latter then maybe a classic strand isn't for her - perhaps something more unusual?
afterthought - good example the suggestions I made for your father -cuff links, pretty classic / single pearl on a thong - developing eccentricity and outside the envelope style